


The Prince, The Princess, and the Beekeeper

by saccharineSylph



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Body Horror, Fairy Tales, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-05
Updated: 2012-08-05
Packaged: 2017-11-11 12:29:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/478556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saccharineSylph/pseuds/saccharineSylph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A princess plagued by a nameless monster wins the aid of her dueling suitors, a haughty prince and a blind pauper. Unfortunately, in this cautionary tale, their brazen overconfidence gives them more than either of them bargained for...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Prince, The Princess, and the Beekeeper

**Author's Note:**

> My entry for Round Two of the Homestuck Shipping Olympics prompt, Monsters, for my team, Feferi<3Eridan<3

  
In the days before days, there was a fair Princess whose hair was as wild as the seas, and skin the color of polished stone. Her eyes were the moons and the graceful wave of her hands moved the tides. For she was the Princess of the Waters, and Life bent to her laughter. Yet the Princess was troubled by a deep monster, kept hidden in the damp caves of her palace, where it groaned its misery to her, and left her heart burdened. For while her queendom adored the Princess, she had no one to call her own and share the weight on her shoulders.  
  
That is not to say that the Princess was alone, oh no. For the Princess had two suitors.  
  
 The first was a handsome and gallant Prince, her match in grace and title, and worth his own weight in arrogance. He held his shoulders square, and only bowed his head to the Seachanger and Lifebringer. His eyes were the color of dark storms, and his tongue like unforgiving lightning, lashing between fangs to strike down his rivals. Quite unfortunately for the Prince, his bolts very seldom hit twice. For all his coy turns of phrase, the Prince was still content to come to heel at the edge of her gowns, and would do whatever it took to have her clasp his arm instead of his mouth.  
  
Now, the second was a poor fellow indeed. The Princess' blind Beekeeper, doomed to wander her gardens tending to his swarm and harvest their bounty. He was ragged, but his wit and intelligence made up for any loose threads and tatters. He was tall and spry like a fresh sapling, with a warm, lopsided smile that enchanted his Princess wholeheartedly. His loss of sight had blessed him with other gifts, like a keen ear and a sharp scent.

  


  
Naturally the two suitors were often at odds with one another. While the Princess forbade them from battle, she could not stop their bickering. Their garden debates and arguments were legendary through the palace and could be heard echoing through almost every chamber. Yet, even they noticed when their Princess' eyes became sad and her sighs heavy. Her monster grew more vociferous by the day, and all in the queendom knew it.  
  
"Oh, Princess, please get rid of him, he does not respect you." The Prince begged her.  
  
"My lady, banish him, for he is not kind to you," The Beekeeper pleaded.  
  
And with her frustration came the monster's cries, enough to shake the palace walls and leave the Queendom to tremble. The Princess stood before her court and ordered the two boys to kneel.  
  
"Continue to brawl and whine such and I will have you both banished! Now leave my sight while I am still in a bright mood."  
  
She seated herself, burying her face in one elegant hand. Neither boy could stand to see her so grieved any longer. For this purpose they would have to work together. So, the brave Prince hatched a plan.  
  
He would march down into the dark caves, and slay the monster himself to win the Princess' favor and her hand. Now, while the Prince might have been brave, he was not nearly so clever as the Beekeeper.  
  
"My Lord," he said, "What shall you take to appease the monster while you slay it?"  
  
"Why should I need such a thing, I can slay it in one swipe."  
  
"Not so," the golden tongue drawled, "The monster is constantly hungry. You will need something to feed to it. Now, my Lord, take me, for while I am stringy and tough, the monster will be pleased enough with my flesh."  
  
"You would sacrifice yourself, then?" The Prince was hesitant.  
  
"Of course. I am but a lowly servant, what other use am I to the Princess?"  
  
The Prince agreed, of course, and congratulated the Beekeeper on coming to his senses on his own self worth.

  
The plan was retooled and relaid. The blind Beekeeper would be set as bait, and the Prince would slay the Monster while she gobbled up the bait. Now, the Beekeeper was often wandering through the palace, and took time to explore the caves there. He knew each rock and cranny, stalactite and pool. The caves were dark as pitch and as cold as he grave, but the Beekeeper was content with darkness. He wound through the treacherous rocks as the Prince stumbled after him, clutching his wand and saber.  
  
"How shall I know when you have been devoured, then?" the Prince asked.  
  
"Why, just listen for the crunching of my bones," he replied, voice bounding off of the cavern walls.  
  
Of course the Beekeeper matched the Prince's foolhardiness with cunning, and had sat the Prince at the mouth of the monster's cave while he hid in the wet shadows. The Prince complained as his fine boots squelched with each step, and how the cold air bit through his velvet breeches. The sooner the monster devoured him the better, the pauper thought.  
  
Soon enough came the squirming of tendrils and suckers as the creature inched out of its cave. The Beekeeper laid still, flattening himself against the floor. While he could not slay the monster, he would at least be rid of his competition for the Princess' heart. He kept his breaths quiet as the beast slithered closer. Its many beaks and mouths snapped and gnashed. Soon enough. He could hear the Prince's saber rattling in fear.  
  
"Ah, my, my." Instead of the grinding of sharp serrated jaws came the Princess' familiar lilt, "What have we here? Two darling boys who have lost their way."  
  
The princess carried a candle, enough to throw light upon her pretty tyrian gown front and frothy lace, cast shadows on her lovely face. Painted on her pretty features was a wicked and knowing smile. As her skirts fell from her cinched waist, they writhed and tangled with many limbs beneath, twisting and undulating against the cavefloor.  
  
She laughed, and the world trembled. "My poor darlings, poor things. You sought to slaughter my monster, my mother. For I am what she is."  
  
They were grateful for the darkness as the Princess took them each into the depths with one dainty hand.

Both the Beekeeper and Prince were never seen in the halls again. Though from time to time their voices were heard with that of the monsters', calling up the rocks and surf, mixing with her joyful giggles. At the very least they were happy, or some twisted semblance of happiness.  
  
And at the very least the monster was never lonely.


End file.
